Toon Game [BxB] [18+]

[Kizzy]

So, I've always loved styles that werent soley anime based. And it's hard to find that in a Visual Novel...REALLY hard, actually. So I decided to try my hand at it ; v ;
I love toons and wanted to make a gritty story about the life of a washed up toon.

SUMMARY:

Polef the Goat grew up without a mother. His father was the star of many shows and films, a regular Mickey Mouse. He was a hero, HIS hero. He looked up to his father and wanted to be just like him!
One day, though..his father passed away, and he felt his whole world crash through the floor.
Polef ended up depressed, hopping bars and drinking almost nightly, smoking and doing things that even disgusted himself. He lacked talent and could never find any roles, let alone lead roles, in any films. He carried his dad's appearance, but that wasn't enough for show business. Saying he didnt get any leads or wasn't a star isn't 100% correct though, as he made it into a few AV films. He hates it, especially since his small size just makes him a fetish. He doesn't get much work in that field.
Down on his luck and constantly depressed, he runs into Kit, a LOVE Model robot. BOTS have recently been making a big scene in town, but something about Kit is...different. He almost seems sentient. Polef is put off by this bot who seems strangely enamored with him, and he wants none of it. Where did this bot come from? What did he want? Could he really feel emotions, or where they just programmed?
Maybe something like him is what Polef needs in his life right about now.
---------------------------

Not sure how many people are interested in toons or cartoony styles ; v ; but it would be nice to get some feedback if any to help me along ^^ This is my first real attempt at a VN, so i'm super excited! (:

[blankd]

Could be really interesting! What are some of the choices or input the player gets to have and what is the potential flow of the game?

Do you have more details you can share about what is done during the course of the game?

[Evolution]

I love, love, LOVE this style of art! I'm always attracted to projects that have "unusual" art styles, but you just pull off the old-fashioned cartoon look SO WELL! And in a BL game, too! That's basically unheard of, as far as I've seen.
I am very much looking forward to this!

One bit of C&C, though: the text box is theoretically a good idea style-wise, but the text itself does not mesh well.

[Kizzy]

I love, love, LOVE this style of art! I'm always attracted to projects that have "unusual" art styles, but you just pull off the old-fashioned cartoon look SO WELL! And in a BL game, too! That's basically unheard of, as far as I've seen.
I am very much looking forward to this!

One bit of C&C, though: the text box is theoretically a good idea style-wise, but the text itself does not mesh well.

Thank you so very much!! ; v ; Yes, I agree, it's hard to find unusual styles/cartoony BL content around, so im so glad that it interests you! I was afraid no one would bother to even give it a chance haha ^^;

Oh yes, ahahah That text is just a placeholder at the moment haha I havent had a chance to toggle with it as I'm still writing out the script (: Once I get the story fully fleshed out then I plan to go back and make it look super pretty ^^
Your critique is really helpful when I go back to fix all the things I need to fix so thank you so much! (im still very new to this whole VN thing so I appreciate your input very much!)

[Lora]

This is a really interesting concept and I'm loving your stylistic choices so far! You've really nailed the "old toon" look. The screenshot has got a great grainy look to it and I love the faded black corners to make it look like an old film reel. It sounds like it might be hard to do but it'd be really cool to have some kind of dust flicker effect animation on the screen at all times, like how old films have always got imperfections flickering about on the projector screen? Dunno if I phrased that coherently or not, but it's just a thought. Would love to see more

[Kizzy]

Could be really interesting! What are some of the choices or input the player gets to have and what is the potential flow of the game?

Do you have more details you can share about what is done during the course of the game?

Well, im not fully sure if its going to be considered a "game" or just be a story with a few options here and there (if that makes sense) hahaha. Im not sure if no matter what, you will always end up with the same ending while still be able to pick out certain things the characters do and dont do (Will still have some playback abilities since choices and determine the different CG's you get to see/not see) Im still trying to decide if there should be different endings or not ^^

Basically the flow...hmm..not sure what you mean, but there will be some views into the main character's daily life, exploring why he is as depressed as he is and learning about his trust issues. Basically its a story of him opening up to someone and learning that the world isnt as messed up as he makes it seem and that he's not such a bad person just because he, and others, thinks he is. So the flow will be pretty tame and calming at times, but I also plan to add some dangerous and exciting elements as well!

Im still testing the waters with Ren'py since it's my first time, but the more I get written with the script, I will update on the deets (: Just the fact that you're interested Really pushes me forward! ^^ so thank you very much!

Im sorry if that didn't answer much! But I promise as it develops I will be able to give you more information (:

[Kizzy]

This is a really interesting concept and I'm loving your stylistic choices so far! You've really nailed the "old toon" look. The screenshot has got a great grainy look to it and I love the faded black corners to make it look like an old film reel. It sounds like it might be hard to do but it'd be really cool to have some kind of dust flicker effect animation on the screen at all times, like how old films have always got imperfections flickering about on the projector screen? Dunno if I phrased that coherently or not, but it's just a thought. Would love to see more

Oh man! That didnt even cross my mind to animate it like that! What a great idea! I wont 100% say I will do it (just because im not sure if it will be difficult or not) But man, that is SUCH a great idea! (: thank you so much!
Im so glad that you are interested in it! This is far more feedback than I ever thought I would get, so it makes me extremely excited! Thanks for your input!! Any and all input is so appreciated!! ^^ <33333
Im happy that people think I nailed the old toon look! (: As easy as it looks, it can be a real pain in the butt! hahahaa thank you!

[blankd]

Well, im not fully sure if its going to be considered a "game" or just be a story with a few options here and there (if that makes sense) hahaha. Im not sure if no matter what, you will always end up with the same ending while still be able to pick out certain things the characters do and dont do (Will still have some playback abilities since choices and determine the different CG's you get to see/not see) Im still trying to decide if there should be different endings or not ^^

Basically the flow...hmm..not sure what you mean, but there will be some views into the main character's daily life, exploring why he is as depressed as he is and learning about his trust issues. Basically its a story of him opening up to someone and learning that the world isnt as messed up as he makes it seem and that he's not such a bad person just because he, and others, thinks he is. So the flow will be pretty tame and calming at times, but I also plan to add some dangerous and exciting elements as well!

Im still testing the waters with Ren'py since it's my first time, but the more I get written with the script, I will update on the deets (: Just the fact that you're interested Really pushes me forward! ^^ so thank you very much!

Im sorry if that didn't answer much! But I promise as it develops I will be able to give you more information (:

That mostly answers my questions actually!

The question regarding choices would be if the story is linear and yes if there are different endings or outcomes. Take your time with Ren'py and don't be shy about asking questions, we all start somewhere. ;D

[Kizzy]

Hey guys! Thinking more on my story, how do you guys feel about censorship?
Would u rather have penis pixelated? not pixelated? there at all?
How do you feel about humanoid penis? (not completely a human penis if even or at all) Since these are anthropormorphic toons, im trying to think of exactly how im going to do this like (if you saw a red rocket would it turn you away from the game) or whatnot? I would love your input! u v u
This is a serious question, not trying to be gross or anything ; v; so input would really help a lot!

[blankd]

Hey guys! Thinking more on my story, how do you guys feel about censorship?
Would u rather have penis pixelated? not pixelated? there at all?
How do you feel about humanoid penis? (not completely a human penis if even or at all) Since these are anthropormorphic toons, im trying to think of exactly how im going to do this like (if you saw a red rocket would it turn you away from the game) or whatnot? I would love your input! u v u
This is a serious question, not trying to be gross or anything ; v; so input would really help a lot!

A very simple compromise is to allow the ability to toggle the "censorship" which is very easy to do with Ren'py (also a cautionary reminder that you might want to brush up on what's material is alright to share in the non-adult forums- I don't think you're doing anything wrong but better safe than sorry, that sort of thing).

As for the material itself, it probably depends? I think some people would be surprised there is adult material in this due to the style alone.

I'm also not sure how much adult material you have, how much there will be or what limits your audience would have. I *personally* don't care but not a whole lot phases me.

Things to consider would be: How much adult material is there? How much of the focus is on the material itself? And how much either option is the focus, since you're asking I get the impression more normalized anatomy would be to your favor, but I'm no expert. 8V

[Kizzy]

As for the material itself, it probably depends? I think some people would be surprised there is adult material in this due to the style alone.

I'm also not sure how much adult material you have, how much there will be or what limits your audience would have. I *personally* don't care but not a whole lot phases me.

Things to consider would be: How much adult material is there? How much of the focus is on the material itself? And how much either option is the focus, since you're asking I get the impression more normalized anatomy would be to your favor, but I'm no expert. 8V

oh! is there a more adult themed portion on this site?? I was trying to be careful but wasn't sure when I was reading the rules what could and could not be said ; v ; thanks for the warning though!

I didn't know you could toggle the censorship! Thats amazing! It will definitely be helpful to me! (: I was leaning more towards pixelation anyways just in case some people DO get a little squeemish over some things then it would help a lot ; v ; and a lot of people dont seem to mind the pixelation in most adult games, so I was thinking that would be a good route to go (:

As for how much adult content, I'd say...two or three scenes that I have in mind are of extreme adult content. so I cant say its a MAJOR focus, rather its just stuff that happens during the story (if that makes sense hahaa) Its a gritty dirty story, so I'ts not just "oh cute toons kissing" kind of thing. So Im excited to get down to the business and show things people wouldn't expect, and hardly get with this kind of style. ^^

(thank you for your input you're really helping me out here (: )

[Taleweaver]

oh! is there a more adult themed portion on this site??

There is, and if you want to post any media unsuitable for a general audience (erotic art/texts), please use the adult forums. However, you may still make "normal" WIP threads in our WIP forum as long as they remain suitable for all ages.

[blankd]

I didn't know you could toggle the censorship! Thats amazing! It will definitely be helpful to me! (: I was leaning more towards pixelation anyways just in case some people DO get a little squeemish over some things then it would help a lot ; v ; and a lot of people dont seem to mind the pixelation in most adult games, so I was thinking that would be a good route to go (:

As for how much adult content, I'd say...two or three scenes that I have in mind are of extreme adult content. so I cant say its a MAJOR focus, rather its just stuff that happens during the story (if that makes sense hahaa) Its a gritty dirty story, so I'ts not just "oh cute toons kissing" kind of thing. So Im excited to get down to the business and show things people wouldn't expect, and hardly get with this kind of style. ^^

(thank you for your input you're really helping me out here (: )

Yeah there is, if you're having trouble finding it, I can probably PM you further instructions.

And the toggling is a sorta manual feature- the coding itself is fairly easy. But yeah pixels/mosaic are pretty common.

I figured as much with the general pitch so- that's why it'll be interesting to see how you go about this 8V