Alright, Alcor, good job with all of this! I'll leave some feedback for you here so far.
Honestly, there is only one case in my own VN where the fourth wall is broken, maybe two, and it can be a good source of humor. I hope you pull this off well, because too much of this may be too quirky - so definitely something worth seeing, I bet. Nevertheless, I didn't play many games that break the fourth wall. Oftentimes it's good to leave a game within its own world, but I am not against breaking the fourth wall at all, I do it myself as well, while not much, I do.
What got me somewhat charmed is the narrator's design. Like, really, these kinds of characters... I saw many TV shows and such where the narrator was weird, some random usual guy or just not very notable, doing his everday job in a studio. You managed to make a narrator that, while looking a little less imperative than the other characters, still manages to stand his own ground visually, as a sprite. So that's really great! You truly put a lot of effort into this, and I can see that. I will say something more, too:
I also rechecked the narrator's sheet. It's blank, no text except his name . I started smiling, almost went into a silent laughter. Like, yes, as I said, less imperative, yet looks somewhat awesome. I'm really excited about truly seeing how his lines and actual ingame phrases will be like. Also, truly interesting hairstyle, again I will stress the point that you designed him well.
Frustrated with the narrator. Oh dear, no, you didn't....
Also, I don't mind that you only showed GUI screenshots mostly, since I don't think I would need to know anything more when I read what you have to say about the project, presenting the GUI is a good thing for us to see, at best. I'm quite okay with this!
I will try to tell something about each of the males, hopefully I will provide useful feedback and opinions.
Okay so you used a different background color for each character, awesome! Makes me feel better looking at them.
You said very few things about each of them, and well, that's like... interesting, I am wondering if the game explains their backgrounds much more intensively? Like, these basic words on their profiles are just enough, yet I am looking forward to see just how much these profiles say compared to the ingame storyline. Then again the purpose of this game is breaking the 4th wall and realizing that they're in an otome game so that's understandable, haha.
Putting their transparent sprite versions in their job outfits (except Nial) behind them is also nice looking, great work!
BRYN
Interesting, first guy to be gentle, diligent and thoughtful - shy and softspoken. You know what? His hairstyle looks quite like mine in reality!
Also, he looks, by his body and clothing, like a street fighter in some way, he could easily be fit for a fighting game! That's just a sily remark I have, ignore it if it's too silly, pretty please. But with those personality traits he has, it makes for an interesting paradox to think this way, so I wanted to say that. ^^
His name reminds me of two of my favorite words, Brine and Brimstone, I use those words quite often when I write randomness on a paper. Okay I will get really nerdy and philosophical and tell you that Brine reminds me of sea, and Brimstone of flames. Like if you combined fire and water.... fiery appearance of a strong guy with a calm watery personality of a gentle person.
Overly a handsome guy, never exactly seen the combination of yellow-orange and gray in this way, almost made me think only construction workers wear these colors of clothing....huh... Though I will say the orange-ish coloring on the part below the neck looks a little plastic, just a friendly remark, but I believe you are improving well!
LEVI
Okay, what...? Are you doing this on purpose? xD Now we have a long-haired guy that seems to dress somewhat normally and non-forcefully, has some feminine appearance traits and wants to be a badass "bad boy"? This is like...the opposite of Bryn..? Or am I just thinking too much about it? He almost looks like he has heterochromia on the picture, thanks to the shadow of his hair, so that does make him look interesting and I got confused for a moment.
I feel unsettled about his problems, when you see that he "hates that he is expected to act charming and gentlemanly". Well, I have not much to say else, this is about it. ^^ Awesome red hair shading and style.
NIAL
Oh gosh, those 1's and 0's immediately make me think like he is a computer program itself or something, when I compare it to your game's info, just the first impression I get.
Sorry, while I won't say much about him, let me just say that these helpful characters that give romantic advice always interested me in VNs, so I think it's a good decision that an advice guy is in your game. Makes it even more interesting when the game is about breaking the fourth wall, eh? Bonus points for being the helper of the narrator.
KEAN
Hmm... You know, until I read his profile, I thought he wouldn't be a "natural sweetheart". You truly are original in many ways, Alcor, and maybe, I just appreciate this because I haven't even played an otome game in my life, and your game will definitely be the first game that I will try, for sure.
*reads the text below KEAN's picture*
(NO EDIT - typing this exactly after the stuff above)
.......OK, I got owned.
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Do you also get the feeling when you can't decide which love interest to pursue? When you have 4 characters? Well, as more and more characters exist, you want to see the best ones first? or the less interesting first? To be honest I can't really decide which character I would be interested in just now. And I am not kidding, there are VNs where some love interests are simply "trash" characters, and you are bored trying to get their interest. Trust me, I played VNs or even some dating sims where I liked only one girl, and the rest of them didn't interest me much. I guess I am picky? or just having natural senses of loyalty? even when playing a game?
I honestly have no real idea who I'd try to date first. I find hope in Bryn's eyes, so maybe him ^^ Yeah, he seems to be the least awkward from what I can see. And I tend to choose less awkward characters first.
Now all of them look really nice, you designed them well, and you truly made me think about your world.
Just please DON'T try to make a review about my eleven characters, that would be an overkill, also because it's not a romance game I am making, but a fantasy story and timeline game.
Now I will answer your recent questions as of 01/30:
---What are your opinions about rollback being disabled in an otome game?
Honestly, I don't truly care. Few of the non-Ren'Py games that I played, even if they did have rollback, I didn't really use it. I just relied on save files. I am having a difficult time deciding that with my project too. I have no idea how exactly rollback handles some certain effects, would have to research. So, I think disabling rollback won't make me shy away from your game.
---Would you play differently if you knew that you cannot rollback to change your choices? (Would you still play at all?)
No. I would concentrate on what your game has to offer, dear. Lack of rollback and not being able to change choices, I honestly don't really find it an obstacle. There was literally a game I felt very frustrated with, because I had totally no idea how to get a good ending with one girl, and I just tried whatever I could, I'm a person who likes surprises and to figure things out myself.
Then there are people who accidently click on a choice. Umm, okay... that never happened to me, so I don't really know how frustrating that really is.
---How many save/load file slots do you typically use in an otome game?
Well I didn't play an otome game, but to be honest, I use around 40 save files in a VN. But I can deal with challenges that game limits throw against me.
---Would you play differently if you knew that the game only allows for one save file to be created?
I guess, unlike the question with rollback, if you allowed only one save file, I honestly would play differently. Then again, I do love challenges, I played NetHack, a roguelike ASCII game, and created over 15 incarnations of the same character concept, always a priestess class - weak in combat, useful for uncursing weapons and equipment, the game wiki reccomended that priest/priestess class is not good for beginners, but I still spammed more and more. Even if people reccomended to switch classes as you find one difficult to play as, I was only interested in being a priestess in the game! To heck with some tourists, valkyries, barbarians, samurais and whatnot. I wanted to be a priestess and win the game as one! OK, I never even got beyond floor 3, always being killed by either hunger or some kind of monster just appearing from nowhere and reducing my HP to zero. Permadeath. Save file deletion when you are defeated. Yet I was still loyal to the priestess class.
Don't play NetHack - It will make you insane if you don't have firm nerves.
But this is an otome game, not a survival game. I think I would play differently if you allowed for only one save file. Depends on how differently you meant. I would perhaps just try to be careful, and not be too frantic with my choices.
---Would you play differently if you knew that each playthrough of the game permanently* changes the game?
YOU KNOW WHAT? I love you! No funny thoughts. I mean, I am doing this with my game as well! Makes me realize I never stated it in my thread, oops If I recall, there is this visual novel Shingetsutan Tsukihime by TYPE-MOON, which needed you to complete the game's main ending once to be able to get different routes on the second playthrough.
So no! I would play completely naturally! If something locks something? There are games which only give you one chance. I personally wouldn't mind if something minor was locked for me, but again, you didn't state which changes will happen that permanently change the game. So let me just say, I would stay away from extreme brutal masochism-core changes like the game not even allowing you to get a chance to do anything. But I know that isn't your intention. Minor locks are great! makes you be careful. Replacing some scenes and text and therefore making everyone's playthrough different, that works well, though some players might miss on some things. It all depends on how you write your dialogue and how the narrator messes things up nurtures the story, of course.
---Which characters are most attractive to you, and why?
Well as I said, I find that difficult, all of them are handsome, but I find most relatable to Bryn. And I like Nial for giving advices and being with the narrator. Levi and Kean are somewhat in the neutral for me, I find Kean a little creepy to be honest. ... And Levi is just... well, hopefully I will know better once I play your game, can't decide perfectly.
Other than that, High five for the narrator! Most interesting narrator I've seen, even though I didn't see that many narrators in overall.
Good luck, best wishes, and cheers!
-Geistbas
