Top/Bottom Role in BL Game

[mitoky]

Hello everyone!

In some games, the main charcater is usually the Bottom while in others you can choose.

Which is why i wanted to ask, do you prefer games with fixed Top/Bottom roles or prefer to be able to decide yourself? Or do you not mind either?

Also, i have somewhere read before (please do correct me if i am wrong) that not all male x male couples go 'all the way' (No Top/No Bottom). Sometimes in games you have the option to skip sex completly, but what would you think about an option to simply not do all/not go all the way?

Thank you in advance!

[SexBomb]

While I think bottoming is more common in standard BL games, I personally prefer a switch hitter.

I'm not too interested in deciding for myself; it takes away an interesting character component, in my humble, gay opinion... but I can definitely see the appeal of being able to decide.

Personally, I can't really comprehend why someone would want to play a BL game without the steam, but I do love when games (yes, even BL games) have a no-romance path. I imagine a lot of lighter BL games exclude sex, but I've never played an 18+ BL game in which you can actively romance a character but choose not sleep with them. I'd definitely be open to it!

[trooper6]

I just want to say that not all male/male couples revolve around a top/bottom dynamic. There was snalso the concept of topping from the bottom. And not all male/male couples have anal sex. There are lots of sex acts and naked fun times that male/male couples can engage in.

But you know what? It doesn't really matter what the reality of gay male relationships are like because BL games are not made by or for Queer men. They are made, mostly, for straight women and mostly have almost nothing to do with Queer life, culture, or experience. There are a few exceptions, but if I want a game that speaks to Queer male experience, I'm probably not picking up a BL game.

[mitoky]

While I think bottoming is more common in standard BL games, I personally prefer a switch hitter.

I'm not too interested in deciding for myself; it takes away an interesting character component, in my humble, gay opinion... but I can definitely see the appeal of being able to decide.

Personally, I can't really comprehend why someone would want to play a BL game without the steam, but I do love when games (yes, even BL games) have a no-romance path. I imagine a lot of lighter BL games exclude sex, but I've never played an 18+ BL game in which you can actively romance a character but choose not sleep with them. I'd definitely be open to it!

I agree, a game with no-romance path can be very enjoyable (:
And that's exactly the intend! I find the idea appealing that you can play a game through once in a more "fluffier" way and at the same time have the option to make it steamier or simply enjoy the story with no romance. So technically mix it in a way you like ^^
Thank you very much for your reply!

I just want to say that not all male/male couples revolve around a top/bottom dynamic. There was snalso the concept of topping from the bottom. And not all male/male couples have anal sex. There are lots of sex acts and naked fun times that male/male couples can engage in.

But you know what? It doesn't really matter what the reality of gay male relationships are like because BL games are not made by or for Queer men. They are made, mostly, for straight women and mostly have almost nothing to do with Queer life, culture, or experience. There are a few exceptions, but if I want a game that speaks to Queer male experience, I'm probably not picking up a BL game.

Thank you very much for your reply (: The question is couples aren't going all the way is more our of curiousity and i thank you for answering honestly. I understand that relationships in BL games are targeted for a female audience and i agree that it may not matter as BL in general is of course not realistic. However, it's neither wrong trying to be at least a bit more realistic in some points. To make an example: Even as female myself it 'hurts' to see when in BL couples jump straight into sex with no preparation. So as reader, even knowing its not realistic, i appreticiate it when BL covers those points (:

As for the option in-game, i love playing games when the story is appealing. By making an option to "not go all the way", "Skip sex scene" or even make a complete no-romance route it would give both, female & male players, the chance to pick up and play a game BL game who's story is appealing to them, even if its an R18 one. At the same time, players who like BL with or without steamy scenes could play the same game and experience the same story, just in a diffrent way.

Even by doing so, the main target are and will be nonetheless girls, but finding ways for players outside of the target audience to enjoy it and play comfortable is what i find appealing in the idea in general(:

[AllegroDiRossi]

In real life, I generally find that there's almost no correlation between personality and position, and very often most people are willing to be versatile (will give or receive) even if they have a preferred position. In my experience, the positions people fall into are more of a reflection of the dynamic of the relationship than following a chosen position. This seems true for most people I know, not just gay men.

Sexuality is more than the dichotomous top/bottom dynamic, so think about the various ways two people participate in sex:
- Are they giving or receiving?
- Are they dominant or submissive?
- Are they on top or are they on bottom?
- Are they rough or tender?
- Do they want to take all their clothing off or keep some on?
- Lights on or lights off?

Characters that stay strictly in those two columns are going to feel pretty staid because everyone has seen this before. Even if you mix up just a few entries in this, you can come up with some interesting dynamics:
- receiving partner who is dominant and wants to be on top
- giving partner who is submissive and wants to keep clothes mostly on
- receiving partner who is tender and wants the lights on

Even if your game is targeted toward women, the characters should make choices about their sexuality that fit their personality. I think hope that the audience is growing and want more realism in the dynamics between their characters. BL, BXB, Yaoi, Bara, I want those genres to become more real and reflective of real relationships, so I always push for realism in interpersonal dynamics.

[FriendlySenpai]

But you know what? It doesn't really matter what the reality of gay male relationships are like because BL games are not made by or for Queer men. They are made, mostly, for straight women and mostly have almost nothing to do with Queer life, culture, or experience. There are a few exceptions, but if I want a game that speaks to Queer male experience, I'm probably not picking up a BL game.

I actually had a conversation about this rather recently so it's nice to see someone else bring this up ♥ The fact of the matter is, op, BL has nothing to do with actual malexmale relationships. They're mostly very unhealthy, grossly misrepresent sex, and you would be much better off doing online research from informational blogs and column pieces than products written by straight women who objectify and capitalize off of the novelty of gay guys while having no idea what they're writing about.

Now, to answer your question:

Just like in heterosexual relationships, no one has to go "all the way." Consent isn't something that just disappears when you cross into the rainbow.

And malexmale relationships don't all adhere to a top/bottom dynamic; plenty of couples switch. And, if someone is a bottom-only kind of guy, it isn't always because he's shorter in stature or has a smaller dick - my guy's got a full foot and sixty pounds on me but prefers bottoming because it makes him feel safer than topping *shrug*.

Sex, as a whole, isn't black and white. Some people keep their shirts on. Others can't do it in a certain position because it makes them feel uncomfortable. Some like it gentler, like water running over sand, than animalistic rutting. If someone is only interested in playing with inguinal canals, or using their mouth, that's just as normal as anything else because sex isn't just about penetration. Remove yourself from the idea that sex has to fit into carefully-established boxes - focus on what your characters are like, personality-wise, and go from there.

On that note... Sex isn't exactly required for healthy relationships, in the first place. Whether it be due to the fact that a person may simply not have any interest in it, or because they would rather wait, there's no obligation for them to engage in any kind of sexual activity. And you shouldn't feel pressured to include those scenes, as a writer, just to fit into some kind of BL mold or to sate a player's horniness.

TL;DR: BL is terrible reference material, and your characters' personalities are more important than fitting into a mold.