Dream Library [Casual][Fantasy?]

Because less is more: Noncommercial games of < 1 hour playtime and < 2 month development time.
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SbHunter
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Dream Library [Casual][Fantasy?]

#1 Post by SbHunter »

"Oh, good, you finally wake up. Let's go now."
"...?"
"Where to? Aren't you the one Hunter invited to visit the Dream Library?"

This will be the first time ever I make a VN. The game doesn't have much plot, but you will have the choice to spend time with few characters and to learn about what kind of realm a young woman called "Hunter" had made to live in with her "children". And when I say "the choice", I mean, there will be many variations of how your short visit in the realm could go :wink:

Sneak Peeks!
VN teaser1.PNG
...
VN teaser2.PNG
...
VN teaser3.PNG
...
VN teaser4.PNG
...
VN teaser5.PNG



Featured Characters
Ellyza the Seer
Ellyza the Seer
Ryu the Emperor/Black Beast
Ryu the Emperor/Black Beast
Aron the Joker
Aron the Joker
Hunter
Hunter


GamePlay


Rough estimation for the playtime is under an hour -- even maybe less than half an hour for one run if you're a fast reader or if you choose one of the shorter routes. And, I know it's supposed to be a short term project, but I work really slow. I think I've been working on this game for two months now.

Estimated Progress: 55%



Please Help...?

As I said above, this will be my very first VN. I feel like a complete newbie, and would really appreciate any advice and comment on what looks good enough, what could be improved -- even about how to go around the forum! :'3

As of now I'm worried about things like: could I post this here? is it alright to post this like this? Am I using the right tags? Would anyone be interested in my game?? Is there any better way for me to attract people to my game???

HALP



(Update 18/04/2019:)
- Added characters introduction!
- Changed GUI fonts to Roboto (Sans Serif family) -- but I don't have screenshot for it tho
- Another small steps in making of the VN


Update 18/05/2019:

Progress was slowed down, until finally stagnate. There is something that made me stop pushing forward and... well, I guess it's no use making excuse. Maybe I lost the motivation because of the obstacles and confusion.

Meanwhile that, I have been playing few more VNs and observing them too. And I've also been talking with people from VNP. I think I have learned a thing or two, and now, feeling like I could've done much better for my VN... I decided to start the project Dream Library all over again. While I might keep some of the assets I've made, I might also renew some. I might tweak the plot a bit, here and there. Maybe switching a concept I first decided to try.

So, uh... ... ... ... I'm not sure how to update this thread now? Do I keep posting on the replies or replace the main post? Guess I'll just think about that later...
Last edited by SbHunter on Fri May 17, 2019 3:35 pm, edited 5 times in total.
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Fisseha
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Re: Dream Library [Casual][Fantasy?]

#2 Post by Fisseha »

Yay for you! You've made a visual novel!

As a complete beginner also, I won't be able to give good tips but I'd like to give my opinions:

:arrow: A game's title always has me pulled in. I really like it, it sounds really magical and I really want to know more. You should add more details about the plot so people would get hooked more. If you're not up for that, introduce to us some of the characters.

:arrow: I think you should work on the art assets. I don't mind the sprites, but you should improve the GUI! I won't be able to give tips about GUI, though :(

For the last question, I'm not sure, I'm so sorry :(
I'm an artist, and probably a weaboo.

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SbHunter
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Re: Dream Library [Casual][Fantasy?]

#3 Post by SbHunter »

Thank you for the feedback, Fish! Let's see...
You should add more details about the plot so people would get hooked more. If you're not up for that, introduce to us some of the characters.
Yeah, I don't think there's much to introduce about the plot, and I thought about putting up little introduction about the characters, but then afraid that it would be a kind of spoiler... hm... maybe I should spoil a little after all?
I don't mind the sprites, but you should improve the GUI! I won't be able to give tips about GUI, though
Aaaaa so I should after all >w<;) I've been thinking about it as well, and since I'm not biggie in coding, I've been putting it for later... but now that you point it out, I'll start thinking of a better design for the GUI. Don't worry about the tips, though! I know there are many place I can look for guide like Renpy documentation and the Renpy cookbook thread! >w<
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Re: Dream Library [Casual][Fantasy?]

#4 Post by tiya_nofurita »

Hello! Thank you for visiting my thread! I feel like I should do the same for you~
As for a newbie, you're on the right track! Make something small and keep it simple, as long as you feel can publish it within designated time. Don't be shy to looking for suggestions/advice. And learn by mistakes :')

As for your post, I think it would be nice to post a bigger screenshot. I could see with no problem though but maybe it's not attractive enough for some people.
And I agree with the former suggestion that you should improve the GUI aspects. Ren'Py default interface now is not as bad as it was (I think it was before 2016) but you can try to experiment with it to enhance your VN overall impression.
Remember, first impression always important. And because this is "visual novel" people tend to look on the visual side first, although the story is still an important aspect.

Did you draw the sprites yourself? Nice :) You could post a bigger version of them too. If you're insert photo background make sure they match the sprites and properly credited too (unless you take the photo by yourself).


<I'm not commenting about your story because I'm a terrible writer>
Webtoon

"For what reason I live?"
Image

---
Completed project:


"What will you see when you are dead?"

Image

MY VISUAL NOVEL

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SbHunter
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Re: Dream Library [Casual][Fantasy?]

#5 Post by SbHunter »

tiya_nofurita wrote: Fri Apr 26, 2019 10:52 am Hello! Thank you for visiting my thread! I feel like I should do the same for you~
As for a newbie, you're on the right track! Make something small and keep it simple, as long as you feel can publish it within designated time. Don't be shy to looking for suggestions/advice. And learn by mistakes :')
Ay ay, senpai, thanks for coming by!

Sad things are: 1) I don't know how to enlarge the screenshot. 2) I work veeerryyyyy sloooooowwwllyyyyy, plus I lack self discipline, so... I don't know when I'm gonna finish this, while I already have like, three or four story ideas for new VNs already X'D

And yes! I made the sprite myself (also my first real effort in trying to make sets of sprite), and for the background -- while I use some photos from pixabay in early times (with bit of alteration), I made half of them myself as well. Which mean, they should be better suiting the sprites, but... well, simplistic, as how my art style is.

I've tried tweaking the GUI a bit, and here's the result so far:
update1.PNG
update2.PNG
update3.PNG
Also, Aron's character intro will be updated!
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Re: Dream Library [Casual][Fantasy?]

#6 Post by Zelan »

Are you still working on this? It looks fun ^_^ I like the art, and I really want to get into the mystery of what this place is! Also, Elly is a very handsome lady. <3

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SbHunter
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Re: Dream Library [Casual][Fantasy?]

#7 Post by SbHunter »

Zelan wrote: Sun Aug 18, 2019 11:41 am Are you still working on this? It looks fun ^_^ I like the art, and I really want to get into the mystery of what this place is! Also, Elly is a very handsome lady. <3
ohgod, it's been... how many years now... *counting* 3-4 years? I'm so sorry that I missed your post for years!

To update the status of the project... I think I lost the game file after I had to get new laptop. I don't remember whether it was that time when my laptop got stolen, or because I spilled tea all over it. I was trying to work on another one this summer, though, and that too hasn't been so successful, but they would (if I ever get around to finish it) still feature more or less same characters: Elly, Ryu, Aron, and... someone called Anderson instead of Hunter. The premise is also different; you're playing as an innkeeper who takes stories as payment for meal and lodging. It still has that bit of mystery with casual fantasy feel, I suppose, although the story wouldn't have as much branching as Dream Library. Instead of a casual hangout, you'll get to hear stories from the inn's patrons :3

As the rawest preview I can provide, I suppose I can at least show you the background for the game... X'D

Image
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