Coming Out On Top (BxB, Dating, Comedy) (News 11/15)

[Ziassan]

Your story was enjoyable & interesting, and I say that as a (not gay) guy.
The writing is style is .. "direct" ? I mean, not fancy at all, efficient. I like it that way. Some funny lines here and here keep a smile on the mouth at the right moments.
About the art, at first I found it a bit special, but after some times to get used, it's a plus as original style. The way the head keep being inclined for some sprites (not sure how to word it) is compensated by the various and accurate expressions.
About music, you wrote "Music : Obscura", are you the composer ? (I thought you said somewhere it was royalty free music)

Overally pretty good read and a "natural" feel, the feel the writer is liking what he writes, which give this "plus" and pleasant feel to the whole creation, good job !

Ps : felt a short tension after the coming out sentence choice, at the start, ahah.

[Obscura]

July 25, 2012 version 1.4 update!

Just minor stuff. Game now has an application icon and more grammar corrections. Link at the top of the thread.

http://lemmasoft.renai.us/forums/viewto ... 11&t=16307

[Obscura]

Your story was enjoyable & interesting, and I say that as a (not gay) guy.
The writing is style is .. "direct" ? I mean, not fancy at all, efficient. I like it that way. Some funny lines here and here keep a smile on the mouth at the right moments.
About the art, at first I found it a bit special, but after some times to get used, it's a plus as original style. The way the head keep being inclined for some sprites (not sure how to word it) is compensated by the various and accurate expressions.
About music, you wrote "Music : Obscura", are you the composer ? (I thought you said somewhere it was royalty free music)

Overally pretty good read and a "natural" feel, the feel the writer is liking what he writes, which give this "plus" and pleasant feel to the whole creation, good job !

Ps : felt a short tension after the coming out sentence choice, at the start, ahah.

Oh wow, the elusive hetero guy playing my game...I think you deserve a trophy of some sort, if not a standing ovation. I think my husband played this with beads of sweat forming on his forehead. He remarked, "It was good, aside from all the descriptions of the dude's body!!!"

But anyways, thank you so much for your feedback. I'm glad you like my writing style. My biggest problem with writing is that I tend to be very curt. My stories always have problems being too short since I like to get to the action as soon as possible. I am amazed at people who can make a 80,000 word game. I have no idea how they do it.

The expressions were kind of a pain in the butt because I had 33 of them for each of the four main characters. I know it doesn't seem that way, but that's because it I had to toss out a bunch of expressions because they ended up looking too weird. But I'm glad they worked out okay for you.

As for the music, I slapped it together with Garage Band (on the ipad). The application has a lot of music samples, so you can just string a whole bunch of riffs together, pick different drum beats and guitar solos, etc. It's actually a lot of fun to use and very easy. Music was probably the biggest gamble of me for all during game development, because I turn down the music in nearly every video game I play. Otherwise I can't concentrate. I'm starting to learn from the VNs here that there is nice, unobtrusive background music, however, so making appropriate music is one thing I'm definitely hoping to improve.

But thank you so much for taking the time to comment, Ziassan! It means a lot to me!

[Obscura]

7/26/2012 news:

Based on the general response to the game, in the next few weeks I'll be working on a major update with new CGs, a few tweaks, and a few other bells and whistles that didn't make it into the first version.

I've decided to go ahead with my plans to expand this into a major game with three more paths

(four if you count Ian/Mark drama )

. These will all be incorporated into the current version, with new backgrounds and updated sprites, etc. I'm pretty stoked about each of the new paths. Each of them should be positively bursting with suspense, comedy, drama, and of course, sexual tension.

I'll report any progress on the expanded version in a new WIP thread.

I'm also planning to post a walkthrough this week.

Again, thank you for your continued feedback, good or bad!

[Destiny]

Sounds great!
Can't wait to see what you are actually planning ^^

[Pyonkotchi]

whooo~ ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* \(◕ヮ◕✿)/ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

looking forward to it n3n

[Veniae]

Oooh my God, that's some good news! I'm definitely looking forward to it! (especially the sexual tension part xD)

Oh, and in case you need some help (be it proofreading or testing or whatever), I'd love to lend you a hand!

[FatUnicornGames]

Yay! I am excited about the expanded version for sure. If you need anybody to bounce ideas off of, let me know.

I didn't say so before, but I did enjoy the sexy bits. A good level of tension without being porny.

[elephantbuns]

This looks awesome! There can never be too many BxB games in my opinion. xD I'm downloading now! Thank you for sharing! <3

[Arelune]

Go for it.
Just make sure the new characters,paths flow nicely in the existing ones. :O

[Obscura]

Walkthrough uploaded 7/26/2012:

http://www.mediafire.com/?nays46tiwrb3yx0

[Obscura]

whooo~ ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* \(◕ヮ◕✿)/ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

looking forward to it n3n

Sounds great!
Can't wait to see what you are actually planning ^^

Aw, thanks guys. The amazing thing is I'm equally excited about all three of them. They're all very different from each other.

Oooh my God, that's some good news! I'm definitely looking forward to it! (especially the sexual tension part xD)

Oh, and in case you need some help (be it proofreading or testing or whatever), I'd love to lend you a hand!

Hee. That would be wonderful!!! I'll let you know Veniae...I really appreciated your proofreading help on the first release...I would like to credit you in the one coming out in a few weeks. I'd like to add your website for Elements or some link. Let me know what it is and if that's okay.

Yay! I am excited about the expanded version for sure. If you need anybody to bounce ideas off of, let me know.

Aw yeah, thanks for the offer. I'll probably take you up on it when I get into the writing stage.

This looks awesome! There can never be too many BxB games in my opinion. xD I'm downloading now! Thank you for sharing! <3

Hope you enjoy it, elephantbuns.
And now I'm thinking about...elephant buns.

[Obscura]

Wanted to get some input on what you guys thought.

For the next version of Coming Out On Top (Alex storyline, more CGs and other treats) I wanted to update Alex's sprite, which has always bothered me.

I'm going for a more sculpted look...so I did a mockup up what he'd look like. I've attached his old and new sprites to compare. The finalized sprite would have to be a little more cartoony than what I have here, but you get the idea.

Hate? Love?

OLD

NEW

[Destiny]

I like it overall, BUT
The eyes.
Don't ask me, but his eyes bug me.
He seems more...aggressive in the new version. Maybe because you kept the eyebrows furrowed, but made the eyes small.
He has a somewhat piercing gaze, but one that makes me think he wants to rape or slaughter someone :'D

But it could be my personal feeling (maybe because that is a look I only do on characters that plan evil things...) ôo
Please don't hate me D:

[chocojax]

I think you could make the shading a little bit more hard, since he'll have a more defining face and facial feature's shadows being sharp = more manly. :v!