Luna's Charm ~ [On hold]

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Cue-san
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Luna's Charm ~ [On hold]

#1 Post by Cue-san » Sun Jun 10, 2012 10:32 am

Guaah, My first ongoing VN ~! (Ohh, I'm excited XD)
Let's start :D


Notes : If the main character needs to sing before the transformation.. That's means : Some of the story have voice. (Most of it singing.)
Luna's Charm ~
Image
"My charm is special,
And I treasure it.
I use it to find someone
Until I met a man,
And the only one,
who makes my heart pound."


Genre's : Romance,Comedy,GxB, Fantasy, Role-playing game and Stat Raising (Mostly, like otome visual game)

Story :
Note : In this game, You will play the role of Luna as a Nice, Energetic, Happy and cheerful girl who aims to have a nice and good family even her mother has passed away. (You must choose the correct choices to obtain Luna's attitude. Raise the right stat and Be very careful.)

Luna is afraid of losing her mother because of an illness only. But it seems that her awareness was apparently true. Her mother died when she was 7 years of age. So Luna learn to make the chores that only adults can do at the very young age , and also learned to work for her daily needs.

When she reached 12 years old, she became an energetic and good child. It caused a liking and respect of her countrymen. Because of her smart and intelligence, she was able to live alone and also because with the help of her neighbors, she was raised with good manners just like having fear for God.

After 3 years, (When she was 15) she have decided to find her missing father.She can find it and will be verified using the necklace given by her mother. It was called Luna's Charm conjunctionaly with her name, because for her, this necklace is an important thing that she needed to preserve for life.

Luna's charm has the ability to change Luna's external appearance, it also provides a light that will give her such high power. But before all, She must sing first a song that is connected to the Charm, which will be held at the Prelude that her mother will sing.

But, while she was on her journey, She will meet many man that fate will bring to her.

Help Luna and her charm to suceed to their mission. Beware of the Antagonist and choose your choices very well. Choose the correct man that will bring her the best happiness and find her father for the best everlasting ending.

Characters :
Image
Luna Fae (You) - Some more art for Luna, -Scroll Down.-
Age : 16
Interests : Food, Coffee, Songs, Music, Oldies, Childrens and Family.
She's hard-headed, Wise, sometimes stubborn, a crying baby, but a friendly one. Easy to talk with, and Easy to love.

(Character Still sketching)
Chris
Age : 17
Interests : Reading, Silence, Playing game (Like chess), Natural Resources and a girl who knows anything and do anything.
He's also stubborn, a cold man, no manners at all, but nice and cares for most important person of his.

(Character Still sketching)
Shawn
Age : 16
Interests : Childrens, Food, Animals, Peoples and Relationships.
Shawn is the sweetest of all. He and Luna were best friends since then. Both of them have the same personalities which makes them agree to each other.

(Character way on Line Art)
Neville
Age : 16
Interests : Talking at the mirror[To him self], Proving his handsome, Playing with girls and Mature girls.
Neville have a narcissism personality. Be careful to him, or else you're gonna fall off with him and you will found something on what's his real intentions and secretes are. (But he's the most funny man of all.)

(Character Still sketching)
Bryan
Age : 17
Interests : Playing and collecting cute stuffs, having tea-cup parties, Making a woman cute, Desserts[Such as cakes]
Bryan is the shyest of all, He's cute, though, Whenever you find out about his secret, You might be poisoned. He's mysterious after all.

Character 6 - (Girl)

Character 7 - (Boy)

Character 8 - (Girl)

*Characters aren't finished yet, But I'm working on it right away ! And yeah, I am slow. I have no tablet =/, and I have my school work days this week June 2012.*
*Some new arts: (Sketches) :
Luna's Tranformation, Basically, The costume is not the real costume, I just got out of the idea.
Image
Luna's childhood appearance (Sorry if I messed it) :
Image

Writing - 70% complete
GUI : 30% complete
Character Designs - 35% complete
Sprites - 40% complete
Progress(Sprites): (On sketch)
CG - 30% complete
Backgrounds - 78% complete
Music - 67% complete
Others(Chibi,Extras,Etc.) : 42%
Updates:
**(There ! Edited : 2 times XD. No backgrounds, no name. I worked hard for it. Beware Mariwa xDD) 6/12/12
** Some renovation, Some arts added, (Sketches) And arts are still worked on, Might update it by this week again. 6/24/12


(Sorry for the art, it's a bit shaky, Since I'm just starting to learn and experiment Sai.)

Credits : SOON.
Last edited by Cue-san on Sat Jun 30, 2012 11:08 am, edited 10 times in total.
* Creating a new life, Back to Study, Back to Arts - Creating a new game >:D<

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#2 Post by MelonCandy » Sun Jun 10, 2012 11:10 am

Ohh sounds like a story-line for a shoujo manga (not saying its bad since I love them)
Hehe Goodluck on your project! I'll be looking forward to this ^^

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#3 Post by Arelune » Sun Jun 10, 2012 11:35 am

So young and already making games? Nice. :)

You might want someone to check your summary though, it has some grammatical mistakes.
You are using bitmap for you logo (aka working in Paint, Photoshop, GIMP or the like), so you have to be careful about some things like resolution. What I mean is be careful of blurred pictures when you make them bigger and 'staircasing' (those raggedy lines you see around pictures sometimes). You probably have to use a soft gum to remove those. You can't do much about the bluriness except use bigger original images.
And watch out for the foot of the girl. A piece has dissapeared. :O

Am I making sense to you? ^^'
Anyway, I'm just giving some tips that I hope will help. Good luck. :)

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#4 Post by Cue-san » Mon Jun 11, 2012 10:01 am

Arelune wrote:So young and already making games? Nice. :)

You might want someone to check your summary though, it has some grammatical mistakes.
You are using bitmap for you logo (aka working in Paint, Photoshop, GIMP or the like), so you have to be careful about some things like resolution. What I mean is be careful of blurred pictures when you make them bigger and 'staircasing' (those raggedy lines you see around pictures sometimes). You probably have to use a soft gum to remove those. You can't do much about the bluriness except use bigger original images.
And watch out for the foot of the girl. A piece has dissapeared. :O

Am I making sense to you? ^^'
Anyway, I'm just giving some tips that I hope will help. Good luck. :)
Haha, yeah thanks. Actually that foot XD. Sorry. That picture was made 7 months ago XDDD.(So it's old) And it's style and losing of feet is original. But I'll repair it later. But, do the logo picture does blurry in yours ? Well you see, Mine aren't . It has a high quality and maybe your net makes it kind of blur. Ugh ! XD. But I use Sai for it. But for me nothing seems wrong. I must check it to my friend's computer next time. Anyways, Thanks :), I really hope to finish it in time :D

@Melon Candy : Oh, XD. Thank you. Makes me wants to work more. Wish me luck ~ :)
* Creating a new life, Back to Study, Back to Arts - Creating a new game >:D<

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#5 Post by Arelune » Mon Jun 11, 2012 10:14 am

I didn't mean that the whole image is blurry, just some parts of it. Like the yellow border and decoration. But if you think it's fine, then that's that. I just give suggestions. ;)

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#6 Post by Cue-san » Mon Jun 11, 2012 10:23 am

Arelune wrote:I didn't mean that the whole image is blurry, just some parts of it. Like the yellow border and decoration. But if you think it's fine, then that's that. I just give suggestions. ;)
Ohh, It's really that blurry, XD So that's it. It's fine though. I just edited it.
And please ? Correct my Summary/Plot if you can.
Well, if it bothers you then it's fine.
But if you can please ? If you don't mind . (Ah, sorry for asking, even you told me that you only tells suggestion. But it's fine for me for you to declined. I'll find someone as long as I can.)
Thanks :D
Last edited by Cue-san on Mon Jun 11, 2012 10:46 am, edited 1 time in total.
* Creating a new life, Back to Study, Back to Arts - Creating a new game >:D<

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#7 Post by nyaatrap » Mon Jun 11, 2012 10:25 am

Sorry to mention a tiny matter, but I think It'd better to know when you're young. Putting a big credits/signs on your art can give a bad impression onto viewers. People may think you love your name more than your art, because there are many artist-wannabe who love their names more than anything and they tend to use huge size of neon signs on their works.

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#8 Post by Cue-san » Mon Jun 11, 2012 10:44 am

nyaatrap wrote:Sorry to mention a tiny matter, but I think It'd better to know when you're young. Putting a big credits/signs on your art can give a bad impression onto viewers. People may think you love your name more than your art, because there are many artist-wannabe who love their names more than anything and they tend to use huge size of neon signs on their works.
Ehh, is that so ?
xD. But I didn't intend to make it as a credit for my picture. (Thanks for the info. :D xD) (I really don't know that sort of thing)
Really, I put the big letter to it to make sure that I own it XD. But, so that's it. Then next time I'll make sure to make it not so big. (But you see, I really intend to put the "Cue-san" because I am scared of someone copying it. D:.) Thus, I'll make sure to lighten it up.
PS : IT'S NOT CREDIT. I'M JUST MAKING SECURE XD.
(Yeah, I love my art the most. I don't care about names anyway, It's not my real though. XD)
Anyway, thanks for the info Nyaa-chan ~ :)
* Creating a new life, Back to Study, Back to Arts - Creating a new game >:D<

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#9 Post by Arelune » Mon Jun 11, 2012 11:00 am

Cue-san wrote: And please ? Correct my Summary/Plot if you can.
Well, if it bothers you then it's fine.
But if you can please ? If you don't mind . (Ah, sorry for asking, even you told me that you only tells suggestion. But it's fine for me for you to declined. I'll find someone as long as I can.)
Thanks :D
Uh, okay. But I'm really not the right person to edit. I'm no Englishman myself and I tend to make weird sentence structures sometimes. :P
But here's what I get when I go over it a bit:

" Luna Fae’s mother recently died due to illness. Right before that, her mother gave her a necklace representing a half moon. It had the exact same name as her own. “My dear Luna,” her mom had said, “find your father, and he will make him happy. Give him this necklace so he knows who you are.”
3 years later, she decides to find him, aided by the necklace. Until then, she will have to find a man who will make her happy. Help her decide who’s best for her as you follow her adventures. Beware of the Antagonist and choose your decisions well.

The Luna necklace is a powerful source that will guide Luna through all the troubles in her life. She calls it ‘Lunatic Charm’. "

The last part about the luna necklace doesn't really fit with the rest so I put it aside.
You better still find someone else if you want to make sure ^^'
Last edited by Arelune on Mon Jun 11, 2012 11:13 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#10 Post by Nuxill » Mon Jun 11, 2012 11:07 am

Cue-san wrote: Ehh, is that so ?
xD. But I didn't intend to make it as a credit for my picture. (Thanks for the info. :D xD) (I really don't know that sort of thing)
Really, I put the big letter to it to make sure that I own it XD. But, so that's it. Then next time I'll make sure to make it not so big. (But you see, I really intend to put the "Cue-san" because I am scared of someone copying it. D:.) Thus, I'll make sure to lighten it up.
PS : IT'S NOT CREDIT. I'M JUST MAKING SECURE XD.
(Yeah, I love my art the most. I don't care about names anyway, It's not my real though. XD)
Anyway, thanks for the info Nyaa-chan ~ :)
Don't worry about about someone copying the picture. If anyone tries the matter can be worked out.
If you want to put a signature on your work it's good to make it small and at the side of the figure, perhaps only overlapping it a tiny bit. And have the name in a color that fits with the color scheme a little better than bright red. That way you can make sure that people know the image was drawn by you and have a bit of overlap so it's harder for art thieves without people thinking that you have an over inflated ego. :P

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#11 Post by Cue-san » Tue Jun 12, 2012 1:33 am

Arelune wrote:
Cue-san wrote: And please ? Correct my Summary/Plot if you can.
Well, if it bothers you then it's fine.
But if you can please ? If you don't mind . (Ah, sorry for asking, even you told me that you only tells suggestion. But it's fine for me for you to declined. I'll find someone as long as I can.)
Thanks :D
Uh, okay. But I'm really not the right person to edit. I'm no Englishman myself and I tend to make weird sentence structures sometimes. :P
But here's what I get when I go over it a bit:

" Luna Fae’s mother recently died due to illness. Right before that, her mother gave her a necklace representing a half moon. It had the exact same name as her own. “My dear Luna,” her mom had said, “find your father, and he will make him happy. Give him this necklace so he knows who you are.”
3 years later, she decides to find him, aided by the necklace. Until then, she will have to find a man who will make her happy. Help her decide who’s best for her as you follow her adventures. Beware of the Antagonist and choose your decisions well.

The Luna necklace is a powerful source that will guide Luna through all the troubles in her life. She calls it ‘Lunatic Charm’. "

The last part about the luna necklace doesn't really fit with the rest so I put it aside.
You better still find someone else if you want to make sure ^^'
Uu,, Thanks Arelune. You're a big help ! I now changed it to yours, and I edit some weird sentences (You say.) Thanks again :D.
(You can ask me too for help if you're making VN. )
* Creating a new life, Back to Study, Back to Arts - Creating a new game >:D<

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#12 Post by Cue-san » Tue Jun 12, 2012 1:35 am

Nuxill wrote:
Cue-san wrote: Ehh, is that so ?
xD. But I didn't intend to make it as a credit for my picture. (Thanks for the info. :D xD) (I really don't know that sort of thing)
Really, I put the big letter to it to make sure that I own it XD. But, so that's it. Then next time I'll make sure to make it not so big. (But you see, I really intend to put the "Cue-san" because I am scared of someone copying it. D:.) Thus, I'll make sure to lighten it up.
PS : IT'S NOT CREDIT. I'M JUST MAKING SECURE XD.
(Yeah, I love my art the most. I don't care about names anyway, It's not my real though. XD)
Anyway, thanks for the info Nyaa-chan ~ :)
Don't worry about about someone copying the picture. If anyone tries the matter can be worked out.
If you want to put a signature on your work it's good to make it small and at the side of the figure, perhaps only overlapping it a tiny bit. And have the name in a color that fits with the color scheme a little better than bright red. That way you can make sure that people know the image was drawn by you and have a bit of overlap so it's harder for art thieves without people thinking that you have an over inflated ego. :P
Hehe, Thank you Nuxill. And I'm, very sorry for the name ! Really. I'm going to repair it. Later ? XD. Coz' I'm going to mall today buying new pens for sketching and line art :)
Thanks again :D
* Creating a new life, Back to Study, Back to Arts - Creating a new game >:D<

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#13 Post by Egressus » Tue Jun 12, 2012 2:42 am

I am sorry to say this, but Lunatic has a very negative connotation. It has 7 meanings and all of them means crazy.
You might want to change the name, seeing as this is an otome and references to being insane is probably not your intentions.
What about Lunar? It means pertaining to the moon. It doesn't sound as catchy, but really, moonstruck isn't the best romance title...
Hiatus of hiatuses

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Re: Lunatic Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#14 Post by Cue-san » Tue Jun 12, 2012 4:13 am

Egressus wrote:..
Is that so. XD. Haha. I just copied it's title to Utau's Shugo Chara, so I didn't know.
Thanks for your opinion of title's choice. But instead, I changed it to Luna's Charm so it'll be better.
Thanks again. :)
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Re: Luna's Charm ~ [GxB] [Comedy,Romance,and *some*Fantasy]

#15 Post by michi 18 » Tue Jun 12, 2012 4:47 am

wow it seems cute the name luna reminds me of sailor moon. Well goodluck with it !
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