Two Steps Back

[VocaloidsRCool]

That does sounds like a fair compromise. That way the ones who helped with voice acting and the artwork can get rewarded for their efforts, and everyone else can get the full story (aka, all the scenes, and the background story bonus.)

You could also make it, so that you can still get the full game if you pay, maybe just increasing the price for those that didn't help. This is your game and these are only suggestions. In the end, the decision is up to you.

In any case, I wish you luck on your game. I hope many people play it, and enjoy it.

[WhiteMageChiu]

That does sounds like a fair compromise. That way the ones who helped with voice acting and the artwork can get rewarded for their efforts, and everyone else can get the full story (aka, all the scenes, and the background story bonus.)

You could also make it, so that you can still get the full game if you pay, maybe just increasing the price for those that didn't help. This is your game and these are only suggestions. In the end, the decision is up to you.

In any case, I wish you luck on your game. I hope many people play it, and enjoy it.

//sobs ugh you're so kind;;; thank you so much ;; ____ ;;

No I really appreciate all the feedback on everything, it's great to get it directly from those playing/experiencing my game ; w ; !!
As I make more [both this game and future ones I create] I hope you'll continue to enjoy them ; w ; <3

[VocaloidsRCool]

I know how important feedback is, as I write stories on Fanfiction.net, so I understand how you feel. If you create more games in the future, I will be sure to play them and comment. Um, I don't play games with male protagonists, but I might give yours a try. It is just because it feels so weird playing as a guy.

I made a short story about your game. I wrote it before I knew that the player was the one keeping them from leaving the game. I would put it on FF.NET, but I want to wait to finish more of my stories before I add anything knew. It is not that good, and is very short, but I hope that you like it.

I am putting it under a spoiler block so I don't spoil the storyline for anyone:

One Step Forward.

'Miss Therese? Miss Therese, are you alright?'

The young woman snapped out of her thoughts, her gaze landing on the boy in front of her.

Feeling like an actress playing out a well-worn part, she lifted her lips to form a smile that was as fake as the world around them.

'I'm fine. I was just thinking.'

Eldin's intelligent eyes bore into the woman's tired blue orbs. While his face was relaxed, and his expression calm, his brown pools held an intensity that spoke volumes.

'About the monster? Or about the world outside of this dream?'

The blonde toyed with a strand of her tangled hair while she thought. The monster could be connected to the outside world, right? I mean, it clearly didn't belong here. But where did it come from, and why was it after them?

No.

Why was it after HER?

Eldin had said that he believed the monster was only after her. But why did it want to kill her? And how could it be stopped?

'Miss Therese...?'

She let out an inaudible sigh, and shook her head.

'I'm only thinking of things that we have both talked about over and over again. We keep asking ourselves the same questions, and neither of us have any definite answers. To make matters worse, no idea that we have tried, has woken us up. It looks like we might be stuck in this place forever.'

Therese started shaking, wondering what would happen to them if they never got out of there. A small, warm hand rested on her arm. Eldin, though terrified himself, tried to smile for the woman unfortunate enough to be trapped in a dream with him.

'Do not worry, Miss Therese. At least we have each other. Together, we can figure out a way out of here.'

The twenty-one year old took in the sight of the strong boy standing there with determination, kindness, and bravery. She knew that as the adult, she should be the one consoling him, but she was too weak, both mentally and physically, to perform such a task. And so, helplessly accepting his comfort, Therese launched herself into the child's arms, pulling him into a tight embrace. The surprise from the sudden action left Eldin frozen for a long moment, after which he immediately, and tenderly, wrapped his arms around the girl.

They were continually dieing, endlessly fighting for their lives, always waking up in the dream, constantly in reverse, forever taking two steps back...

But they would get out of that accursed place. They would make it.

As long as they had each other, they could keep going.

[WhiteMageChiu]

I know how important feedback is, as I write stories on Fanfiction.net, so I understand how you feel. If you create more games in the future, I will be sure to play them and comment. Um, I don't play games with male protagonists, but I might give yours a try. It is just because it feels so weird playing as a guy.

I made a short story about your game. I wrote it before I knew that the player was the one keeping them from leaving the game. I would put it on FF.NET, but I want to wait to finish more of my stories before I add anything knew. It is not that good, and is very short, but I hope that you like it.

I am putting it under a spoiler block so I don't spoil the storyline for anyone:

One Step Forward.

'Miss Therese? Miss Therese, are you alright?'

The young woman snapped out of her thoughts, her gaze landing on the boy in front of her.

Feeling like an actress playing out a well-worn part, she lifted her lips to form a smile that was as fake as the world around them.

'I'm fine. I was just thinking.'

Eldin's intelligent eyes bore into the woman's tired blue orbs. While his face was relaxed, and his expression calm, his brown pools held an intensity that spoke volumes.

'About the monster? Or about the world outside of this dream?'

The blonde toyed with a strand of her tangled hair while she thought. The monster could be connected to the outside world, right? I mean, it clearly didn't belong here. But where did it come from, and why was it after them?

No.

Why was it after HER?

Eldin had said that he believed the monster was only after her. But why did it want to kill her? And how could it be stopped?

'Miss Therese...?'

She let out an inaudible sigh, and shook her head.

'I'm only thinking of things that we have both talked about over and over again. We keep asking ourselves the same questions, and neither of us have any definite answers. To make matters worse, no idea that we have tried, has woken us up. It looks like we might be stuck in this place forever.'

Therese started shaking, wondering what would happen to them if they never got out of there. A small, warm hand rested on her arm. Eldin, though terrified himself, tried to smile for the woman unfortunate enough to be trapped in a dream with him.

'Do not worry, Miss Therese. At least we have each other. Together, we can figure out a way out of here.'

The twenty-one year old took in the sight of the strong boy standing there with determination, kindness, and bravery. She knew that as the adult, she should be the one consoling him, but she was too weak, both mentally and physically, to perform such a task. And so, helplessly accepting his comfort, Therese launched herself into the child's arms, pulling him into a tight embrace. The surprise from the sudden action left Eldin frozen for a long moment, after which he immediately, and tenderly, wrapped his arms around the girl.

They were continually dieing, endlessly fighting for their lives, always waking up in the dream, constantly in reverse, forever taking two steps back...

But they would get out of that accursed place. They would make it.

As long as they had each other, they could keep going.

//sobs grossly I can't believe something I've made would ever get a fanfic;;;;; I'm so honored;;;;;;; Q __________ Q
Sure it's short, but it's quality over quantity yes?? U u U //nods

You got their characters down as well~ haha that makes me especially happy. Thank you so so much I'll treasure this <3
[As for the next game I have planned? Another female lead~ and the one after that is a co-star female and male leads~]
...but both of those are still so far off from now hahaha;;;orz

[VocaloidsRCool]

I am so happy that you like it!

I am glad that you aren't yet thinking of making a game with only a male lead. For some reason, bxg and bxb games get done sooner than games with a female lead.

In any case, I will wait patiently for your next games.

[WhiteMageChiu]

I am so happy that you like it!

I am glad that you aren't yet thinking of making a game with only a male lead. For some reason, bxg and bxb games get done sooner than games with a female lead.

In any case, I will wait patiently for your next games.

It's a precious gift how could I not?? ;; v ;; <3 <3

Hahah yeah, I dunno I guess I feel like in a lot of ways women aren't portrayed properly yet???
Even when a strong female [lead or otherwise] is written... 9 times out of 10 it'll still mostly revolve around "love interests" and "relationships"

Like wth those aren't what make women what they are : /
That's not the only way to be able to understand, empathize with, or grow a female character.
I hope to break that kind of thinking, even if just a little bit, with my stories and characters.
Regardless of gender, I just want to write about human beings.
But for now I will focus more on females yes hahaha XD

[VocaloidsRCool]

I do love a good otome game, but, you are right. Chasing after a guy like a love-sick puppy or acting cool to get a guy to like you, isn't the only thing women are capable of. I would like to play a game where the main focus isn't going after a boy.

Maybe in the future, there will be more games like that. However, I hope people also continue to make otome games. I can't help, but love those. As a forever alone kid, they keep me sane and happy. XD Nerds need love too, after all.

[WhiteMageChiu]

I do love a good otome game, but, you are right. Chasing after a guy like a love-sick puppy or acting cool to get a guy to like you, isn't the only thing women are capable of. I would like to play a game where the main focus isn't going after a boy.

Maybe in the future, there will be more games like that. However, I hope people also continue to make otome games. I can't help, but love those. As a forever alone kid, they keep me sane and happy. XD Nerds need love too, after all.

Hahahah agreed agreed!!! U u U //total sucker for Rune Factory games and the like

[Anne]

I think the sounds you already have are perfect for your game and additional music / voice acting would only disrupt the atmosphere.
I like the main idea

seemed kinda obvious to me except that I still had some doubts like if you scroll through 5 - 10 - 100 - 10000 times something else might happen because there are games that do that to the player

and I think it doesn't need any more detail (on the experiment or characters) unless you want to upgrade to having more than just that one idea.

[Hyraculon]

I got a kick out of the "ending." Putting in all the extra sprites for Therese was a nice touch as well.

[FjärilPrincess]

This sounds cool.In an,er,creepy way.I...I was reading the comments and I was so bummed out because I read all of the spoilers (This is why people need to use the darn 'spoiler protected text'.JESUS..).Anyway,spoilers won't stop me from playing the game (It did make me have less to look forward to but I still prefer playing a game than just hearing about it.It's kind of like saying a cake tastes delicious because someone else said so when you,yourself,haven't tasted it yet.Erm,I suck at comparisons)! I didn't read ALL (the spoilers) but I read enough to know something about a dream and that they keep dreaming (?) because the player is playing the game? I don't know,I'm confused.But I won't be when I play the game! *_*.I can't really say much right now.I promise that I'll give a review when I'm done playing it.It looks very enjoyable and....mysterious xD.Ooohhh,but..I may give that review later tomorrow (or today,depending) because of time management and I also have to play other games.On a completely different note,I love Rune Factory,too! I hate how the only option was to play as a guy (that was in the Rune Factory that I got.I know a Rune Fact. that allows you to play as a girl.).I was a kick-arse Wooly ;D.I married Raven and had 3 kids O_O.That was one heck of a game.~POWER TO THE RUNE FACTORY LOVERS....and stuff...~.

[WhiteMageChiu]

Ah! I'm so sorry guys! @m@;; I stepped away from the forums for a bit!!

@Anne: Ah you think so hmm? Mmm... I'm glad to hear that I was able to pull off a cohesive environment, but I'd still like to try to get some voice acting in there... if it does seem like too much as you say though I'll pull them out!
Glad that the point came across well enough! It hasn't with everyone so I'm happy to hear both sides!
I am currently writing out two more scenarios, which won't change anything, just elaborate more on the experiment/ characters, and while I am fond of the original obscurity I made, if I want to make this into a product I sell, I feel like there should be some new content. I'm working hard to make sure it only improves the overall feeling though, and not just adding on useless information for the sake of just adding more!

@Hyraculon: I'm so happy to hear!! I was afraid it might aggravate people hahah! Though I suppose that'd be a fine response too~

@FjärilPrincess: I'm sorry to hear you got spoiled! I sure hope it doesn't ruin the entire experience for you! If it's not too much trouble I will look forward to a review from you ; w ; /

[WhiteMageChiu]

Hey everyone! I'll be posting in the completed forum too but thought I'd update here:

I'm starting a KickStarter!! Whoo!

You can find the preview here:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/44 ... n=d71daff7

It'd be great if you'd take a look, maybe even help back or just spread the word!!

Thank you all so much for the help and support you've given <3 You're all the best!!