Katherine

[denzil]

Well my first finished...
Thanks to everybody who helped me.

Synopsis: It all begun when a new schoolmate joined your class. It was a bit strange this late in school year, but you don't care about that, because this new nice girl is now sitting beside you. And that is just beginning...

Download here or from the Ren'Ai Archives mirror.

[herenvardo]

Downloading it... I'll tell you something once I've tried it.
Anyhow, if you want people to get interest in downloading it, maybe would be useful to add some comments about the game. A brief sinopsy, or at least telling what kind of game is would be much more than it may seem, and will surely be better than nothing.

[herenvardo]

Well, just tried it and got ending 1/4.
I'll start with the bad news:

• There where some misspellings, which I guess are typing errors; so I'd suggest you to review it.
• When the game asks for confirmation to quit, and when going to preferences, there is some green text over green background that is almost unreadable. My best suggestion to solve this is to pick another background for the main screen, but it's up to you.

Now, this is what I found best about the game:

• Even personally I don't like too much this style of game, it's well done. Timing and story are very consistent and well designed, advancing at a natural pace.
• I didn't like too much the look of Katherine, but that's again a personal like. Her personality is solid and coherent: another important part of the game that you have done well.

So, my global valoration is that it's a good game, even with a few bugs. It's not the kind of game I like, but I can be neutral enough to look separately at quality.
I'd like to comment something about music, but currently my PC has no speakers, so I couldn't listen it. Anyhow, I'll make a try to get speakers and then play again

[TMBpower]

First of all, congratulations for completing your first game!:D

I found the story to be quite repetitive after a while...there's way too much interaction that doesn't contribute to anything; it's

basically a walkthrough of the town and not enough focus on Katherine herself. To correct this, I would give her more of a backstory. More then just "I just moved here, my mom died, ect." Because I noticed even in the end, it didn't matter anyway.

I think I got all the endings. I got three for sure, but there was

one where you decide not to make her tired in the cafe

where I didn't get a confirmation that it was 4/4, just the credits.

And all these endings are almost practically the same! For the first "normal" three, the only differences are that you decided to read further. Even in the longest one, you didn't get closer to Katherine then you did in the two shorter ones. Adding some simple surprises (like maybe meeting up with the player's friends) are enough.

And the more "advanced" one where you bring Katherine to the beautiful spot...eh. There was no real conclusion. Even though it's just one day, couldn't you have added more then the bus scene that we've seen three endings before?

Otherwise, decent art (more expressions would be nice), good BG selection, and good music.*leaves the game on just so she can hear it* XD

Hope you don't take this harshly. I think this could be a great game if you added more elements to it.

[papillon]

Got ending 3 on first go.

Mostly my comments align with what's been said already - in the future you should probably have someone else proofread your text, and a lot of it just feels like pointless wandering around looking at stuff without enough sense of change. However, by the end of the playthrough I did feel a sense of friendship building between them and personality that got through the sometimes-fractured text.

Also, the music is pretty.

[denzil]

Okay thanks for responses (and criticisms).
About the typos - I tried to find editor but failed...
There was a bug in the script causing not showing you certain ending in some cases. Sorry TMBpower (and others).
I fixed download and also put here fixed version of the script as attachment.

It was ending 2

About the endings being almost the same:

I planed originally only two endings so it wouldn't be that big problem.

Better next time

[herenvardo]

Even I agree with TMBpower and papillon in the fact that you only wander around the town with her, I feel it's very realist. This is, she is a shy girl, and just arrived to the city that day; you cannot expect to get her in so few time, if you tried you could even scare her. While in most games you get easily burnt in the fire of romance, this one is about the spark that lits the fire. Anyhow, variety is wealth; so I'd suggest you to get a bit depper in romance on your next project. To achieve that, you may use a longer timeline, or put there a girl that's not so shy; or you could even make a sequel: now that Katherine knows a bit more about the city, is time to go a bit further
In addition, this last option has the advantage that you could reuse most of the art in this game.
PD: I've just downloaded the new version of script. I still have to test it, but I've noticed that the issue about green text over green background is still there.

[mikey]

Well, I finished all the endings now. I guess a lot of the comments have already been made, even though I see some of the mentioned things positively.

So if I would have to point out something myself, then I'd say Katherine seems to always be in the picture. Maybe when introducing the place, (for example you just reached the museum and the protagonist says a few lines like: - we reached the museum - it's surrounded by a quiet park - there are not many people around here), these first few lines could do without Katherine in the picture, so that the description of the place has more impact.

Also, I am usually very sensitive to music, and I don't like MIDIs, because they sound flat. I felt that the music in Katherine was also MIDI-ish, perhaps those were low-bit instruments in a song converted to .ogg, but somehow the music didn't have the depth (the sound depth). For me this was a bit of a problem, because for me, this is always a problem ^_^. Anyway, the melodies and songs as such were fitting, even though Solid Ground didn't feature a piano, which made it a bit different - then again, it was the normal starting music so I suppose that's okay. Some of the tracks did end with quite a bit of silence at the end, so before they started again, there was a bit of a hole. Cutting the two-tree silent seconds off the end would do the trick, I think.

A tiny thing about the conversations, it was interesting to see how the protagonist is basically shy, but from time to time he makes a joke or says a thing that I feel is not what a shy person would say. It was always in the presence of Katherine, and I liked their gentle interactions, so maybe it was that when they were together their shyness somehow went away. Still, some of the things they said felt quite direct.

However, I am glad that none of the above really had a really bad impact on the game as a whole. The fact is, I really like it. I like the slow-moving atmosphere, I like the fact that the conversations are very banal. I even like the pointless walking and I like that the end isn't really an end, but just the beginning.

I also like the fact that the choices are not only logical, but during the conversations Katherine will tell you what she likes or dislikes, so if you listen to her, you will be able to take her to places she likes and have the 4/4 ending on your first try. The game doesn't try to be complicated and I admire that.

For me, Katherine is a small game that focuses on the first romantic time with your girl. If you know and understand this, it's not hard to put all the small flaws away, and enjoy it as the game it is.

So welcome to the Game-Makers Club! I hope you'll continue making games, good luck for the future.

[denzil]

This should fix the text color problem.

[herenvardo]

This should fix the text color problem.

It's still green over green, but it's much more readable now.
And since I didn't said before, congratulations! You've done your first game, that's a good thing, an special moment, and all that... I hope this is not the last, and you continue working on games... even that wasn't the style I like, if something is good, it's good, no matter who likes it.
Good work! Take some days to flavor your success and then go into the fray again (if you want, of course). The next game you make will be probably better, and the following one even better, and so on, so keep on it.

[ShiraiJunichi]

You may want to put your updates in the first post, so newcomers don't download the old version, only to find out later that they could've enjoyed some bug fixes and such

[herenvardo]

You may want to put your updates in the first post, so newcomers don't download the old version, only to find out later that they could've enjoyed some bug fixes and such

The forum scripts don't always allow it. Anyhow, an alternate method could be to upload it somewhere and put a link to it. Then, when a new version is uploaded, the link still points to it.

[denzil]

The link in first post points to file that is up to date and unles somebody is downloading it it's updated at the moment i post updated script here.
(As I had some problems with the free webhost I used during betatesting the download goes directly from my computer. I have to find a place for mirror.)

[PyTom]

Well, once you're satisifed that the game is done, and assuming the music checks out copyright-wise (which I belive it should, based on where I think you got the music from), then we'd be happy to have it as part of the archives.

[herenvardo]

The link in first post points to file that is up to date and unles somebody is downloading it it's updated at the moment i post updated script here.
(As I had some problems with the free webhost I used during betatesting the download goes directly from my computer. I have to find a place for mirror.)

As an alternative, I offered to host any game that needs it on my server. Look at the corresponding post at http://lemmasoft.renai.us/forums/viewto ... 3&start=40