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[NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 9:19 am
by Lumen_Astrum
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"The action of remembering is already a sign of repentance."

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For Milicent, turning her back from her dream isn't an easy job.

She had left behind everything as she leaves the military: her life, her dreams, her joy and her only hope on actually "living". Even those emotions and memories she knew she had forgotten long ago... she knew she'd be leaving them behind. But then, another thing she thought she left behind had actually remained with her all the time. And it was a "split personality" that is inside her.

Of course, she has nothing to do with her. She actually treats her more like a burden than what this personality claim as a "sister". As she tries desperately to get rid of her, she opens up a past she had hidden long ago, and to remember all the bitter memories she tries to forget.

Note: This is some sort of "sequel" for Soul and Heart. May require playing it first to understand this more, but both are open-ended.

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Story, Sprites and Script - Lumen
OhMhaiGosh- CG Help
azureXtwilight - Beta-testing, a bit of CG help
Kirroha - ???'s giggling
Jamendo, SENTIVE, Neosounds, wakaba-music, Rengoku Teien - Music
Samu-kun's photographs and some Japanese site I lost the link into - Filtered Photographs for BGs

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Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 9:22 am
by azureXtwilight
Kya~ This is out! XD I've seen the draft of this but I haven't seen the whole completed stuff yet with music and pictures. I'll play in a mo and then I'l give you a *superlongreview* XD

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 9:37 am
by Lumen_Astrum
Thank you so much, azure! That's a very nice thing to hear, coming from you ^^

Spruced up first post a bit, hopefully it might help on attracting more players. XD
I'm looking forward to all your reviews, people! :)

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 9:58 am
by Hijiri
Downloading. Considering how much I loved Soul and Heart, I have a feeling Im going to love this as well. Ill review in a bit

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 10:51 am
by redeyesblackpanda
This is going to be awesome! Gotta download it now... :lol:

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 11:28 am
by azureXtwilight
Done playing~

First off, I really love the art. I know how hard it is to finish a game within one month with so many CGs, and you succeeded! That was a really awesome work! Not to mention you helped me with mine, but I digress. Ahaha. It's so glad to see that you're a one-man show and it turns out to be neat and beautiful. Gosh that mutilated cat CG, my heart is broken TT^TT The sprites all look nice as well~

About the storyline, I think it's just left open-ended. Is it intentional? Because I really want to know about how the ??? character can
stay dead for years and suddenly she's declared to be "Recently dead".
I think it needs to be explored more. Also about that machine that is supposed to alter memories, I think we still need some more explanation there. Characterization-wise, I think you've really grasp ???'s creepy personality though. I can see Millice in a different light now.

Also, I am wondering why you keep switching between NVL and ADV, is there some purpose behind that? Or was it intentional? Hmm...

Overall, it is a very nice read. I'm really glad the music fits well into the scenes and I really look forward to your games in the future. Congratulations on the release! WOOT~!

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 12:18 pm
by saguaro
First, the atmosphere is really great, very creepy and bleak. The music, the art, and the pacing all worked well together.

It sounds like this is an off-shoot of your other game, Soul and Heart, which I have not played. I think you broach some interesting issues that could be expanded even further. The narrator obviously has a personality disorder and extreme psychological issues, which have led to a mental break, and you conveyed her frustration and confusion very well. You didn't explicitly say so, but I got this impression this country might have forced conscription, which would help explain (to me) why person with so many psychological issues was able to get into the service in the first place.

There were a lot of things that were interested that didn't really get explained, like the memory machine and whatever's going on with Sirius and the other characters (though I assume this is explained in S&H). The ending was a little confusing, but I liked the epilogue-style ending interspersed with credits. Again, the pacing--you are very good at pacing!

You might want to consider having an editor to look over the script. There are some grammatical/wording issues a good editor can fix while adding a little polish.

Congratulations on finishing this in a month. I will check out Soul and Heart sometime, too.

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 12:21 pm
by StarryRainBreeze
omg *downloads* *_*

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 7:07 pm
by psyduck
this looks interesting. :) I like black and white art work. downloading it now.

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 8:30 pm
by StarryRainBreeze
wait what happened in the end?
did she die D:

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 10:04 pm
by Hijiri
Alright, finished now. Congrats on finishing! (Unlike some of us ;_; )
Overall, it was excellent. Art and music seemed to fit perfectly with the story. Though just one thing:
The ennding is very confusing. Like there's something missing between when Millicent enters the memory chamber and when she talks to her sister.
Other than that, there was this error:

Code: Select all

'm sorry, but an uncaught exception occurred.

While running game code:
JumpOutException: bonus

-- Full Traceback ------------------------------------------------------------

Full traceback:
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\bootstrap.py", line 291, in bootstrap
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\main.py", line 357, in main
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\main.py", line 98, in run
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\execution.py", line 261, in run
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\ast.py", line 632, in execute
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\python.py", line 977, in py_exec_bytecode
  File "common/_layout/screen_main_menu.rpym", line 11, in <module>
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\ui.py", line 237, in interact
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\display\core.py", line 1798, in interact
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\display\core.py", line 2322, in interact_core
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\display\layout.py", line 714, in event
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\display\layout.py", line 714, in event
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\display\layout.py", line 714, in event
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\display\screen.py", line 298, in event
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\display\layout.py", line 714, in event
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\display\layout.py", line 714, in event
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\display\behavior.py", line 623, in event
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\display\behavior.py", line 204, in run
  File "common/00screen.rpy", line 354, in __call__
  File "C:\Documents and Settings\Kira\My Documents\Downloads\Twin Faces-win32\Twin Faces-win32\renpy\exports.py", line 991, in jump_out_of_context
JumpOutException: bonus

Windows-XP-5.1.2600-SP3
Ren'Py 6.13.8.1675
Twin Faces 1.0
Got it after I exited the bonus menu and tried to enter it again.

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2012 12:54 am
by Lumen_Astrum
Woah, so many comments! XD Thank you all, I'm glad you liked it! :)
azureXtwilight wrote:Gosh that mutilated cat CG, my heart is broken TT^TT
Now suddenly I feel all cat-lovers are staring at me with hatred and want to mutilate me as well.... O_O
azureXtwilight wrote:About the storyline, I think it's just left open-ended. Is it intentional? Because I really want to know about how the ??? character can
stay dead for years and suddenly she's declared to be "Recently dead".
I think it needs to be explored more. Also about that machine that is supposed to alter memories, I think we still need some more explanation there. Characterization-wise, I think you've really grasp ???'s creepy personality though. I can see Millice in a different light now.
As I said in the bonus section, any confusions are either intentional or just a biiig plot hole. XD
And hey, maybe she HAS risen from the dead like Milicent had guessed before. >D
azureXtwilight wrote:Also, I am wondering why you keep switching between NVL and ADV, is there some purpose behind that? Or was it intentional? Hmm...
It's a symbolic take on the entire thing. XD If you remember in S&H, NVL mode is only used in flashbacks, in Twin Faces, it's sort of means that
each conversation/encounter she haves with Mae is going back to the past. Sorta.

azureXtwilight wrote:Overall, it is a very nice read. I'm really glad the music fits well into the scenes and I really look forward to your games in the future. Congratulations on the release! WOOT~!
Thank you so much for reviewing! I really appreciate the time you spent on typing this up XD
saguaro wrote:First, the atmosphere is really great, very creepy and bleak. The music, the art, and the pacing all worked well together.
Thank you so much! It was quite hard to match everything together to get the right mood, so I'm very happy about it ^^
saguaro wrote:It sounds like this is an off-shoot of your other game, Soul and Heart, which I have not played. I think you broach some interesting issues that could be expanded even further. The narrator obviously has a personality disorder and extreme psychological issues, which have led to a mental break, and you conveyed her frustration and confusion very well. You didn't explicitly say so, but I got this impression this country might have forced conscription, which would help explain (to me) why person with so many psychological issues was able to get into the service in the first place.
People here get into the military by appointment, so yes, it added up into her confusion.
Twin Faces happens a couple of days after Soul and Heart. Milicent is a character only introduced in the middle of the story, and many people who played S&H were confused with her and her attitude.
The protagonist in S&H had a "guess" about Milice/Sgt. Calypso being bipolar, but it was never confirmed.
saguaro wrote:There were a lot of things that were interested that didn't really get explained, like the memory machine and whatever's going on with Sirius and the other characters (though I assume this is explained in S&H). The ending was a little confusing, but I liked the epilogue-style ending interspersed with credits. Again, the pacing--you are very good at pacing!

You might want to consider having an editor to look over the script. There are some grammatical/wording issues a good editor can fix while adding a little polish.

Congratulations on finishing this in a month. I will check out Soul and Heart sometime, too.
I honestly thought the reader knowing it's a machine that recovers memories will be enough. XD
Practically that machine is a part of the records room from S&H, used to "access" memories, data, personal records, stuff like that.
I was SUPPOSED to get an editor. The only editor I trust (and practically I want her because she's quite a good writer as well) was quite busy, and since I got a little trouble with my editors at S&H, I didn't dare post up a recruitment thread.

Thank you so much for taking your time to write a review! :D
StarryRainBreeze wrote:wait what happened in the end?
did she die D:
Only Mae "died". Milice didn't.
Hijiri wrote:Alright, finished now. Congrats on finishing! (Unlike some of us ;_; )
Overall, it was excellent. Art and music seemed to fit perfectly with the story. Though just one thing:
The ennding is very confusing. Like there's something missing between when Millicent enters the memory chamber and when she talks to her sister.
Other than that, there was this error:

Code: Select all

Got it after I exited the bonus menu and tried to enter it again.[/quote]
Aww, I was looking forward to your NaNo as well! D: I hope you finish it sometime in the future!
I thought there was something missing in that part as well, but I was running out of time to edit it or add anything else ^^;

I also got that error in S&H, but there was nothing I can do to fix it. Sorry D:
Thanks for reviewing again!

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2012 12:56 am
by Hijiri
Hmm, did you use labels or screens for your Bonus menu?

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2012 1:08 am
by Lumen_Astrum
I did use a label to call the bonus menu, and used return to go back to the main menu. Personally, I think it has something to do with the "return" thingie but I dunno XD

Re: [NaNoRenO 2012] [Kinetic Novel] [Mystery] Twin Faces

Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2012 1:11 am
by Hijiri
Might be better to do it in Screens, since the newer versions of Ren'Py don't play nice with labels.